June 19, 2021

Naija Sweet


My Landlord Is Cooking Rice And Chicken

4 min read

1)My Landlord is cooking rice
and chicken*
Let me go and remind him that I
picked his clothes yesterday
when it wanted to rain

2) Schools should stop teaching
kids things that are not possible
in real life – things like brushing
teeth three times a day.
3)A guy wasted his time nd
transportation from here to Kogi
only to find out dat he was
chatting with a 13yr old girl,*
Facebook wicked!
4)I Am Killing One Small Goat
For Sunday Stew And My
Landlord Is Watching Me One
Kind Way For Ordinary One Year
5)If you can’t give your girlfriend
transport money then date a girl
in your area
6) Whenever my wife sings, i go
out to prove to my neighbors
that I’m not beating her
7)My Junior in Secondary School
now calls me ‘My guy” This life
errrrrr, nothing lasts forever.*
You cannot carry senior to
8) They are only two naked thing
that can kill a man
1). Naked wire
2). Naked woman
9)After being dumped!!*
White girl : My bf has dumped
me. *
Black girl: I choose happiness.
Am the CEO of my life.

If it doesn’t kill u,it makes u

I love the woman am

When bad people leave ur life,
good things starts happening.

I Am crushing on myself. Self

10)I know some people that if
they convert their sense to
recharge card, it won’t still be
able to flash..

But I won’t tag anybody

11) To the people complaining
that fast food looks better in
advertisements than it does in
reality…look at your profile
picture and then look in the
Still stunning
12)The reason why we are still
important to some girls is
because vibrators cannot buy
Airtime,Pepper soup, drinks and
Guys make I loud am?
13)If ur hubby is tall, dark,
speaks yoruba and drives High
lander, he didn’t go to work o*
He’s in my compound cooking
for my neighbour

14) Sometimes You Have 2 Enjoy
Yourself Go Out, Buy Pampers,
Put it on And just Piss
15) Dating a Jehovah witness girl
is pure Gold
No birthday,No Xmas,No
clubbing,No Valentine,
just,hand bag,umbrella & Sandals
16)Don’t let any guy decieve you
that you look like Angel…*
Angel no dey bleach
17)The fear of “Nobody knows
tomorrow” is the reason some
people still have your number.*
If you know you know
18)I don’t like people who can’t
let go of the past. Especially
people I am owing money*
19) I withdraw 10k yesterday and
tried acting rich in my room. I
stood 1 corner nd sprayed
everytin in d air. Nw I dont knw
wer 1k entered *
20)Broken heart sometimes
can make you buy recharge card
and request for polythene bag.*

21) Some ladies use makeups but
still looks like baloteli
sister who bewitched you

22)Remember when you
promised yourself that no man
will touch you until you get
married . Look at you now,
doggy is your favorite.*
23) During kissing
where does your hand go?
Me: Chest bcus I love to recite
national pledge during kissing
24)Instead of dating a guy and
expect him to pay your rent, why
not date the Landlord

No abuse me o if you no want
make I slap your conscience
25) I remember when makeup
was just eye pencil and vaselin
… …
Now its cement, gravels, red
sand and other building
materials *
26)If you’re a student and ugly,
nothing should stop you from
graduating with Good grades.
I mean who’s disturbing and
distracting you ?

27) U r angry I did not send u bd
U posted,,Wow ,I can’t believe I’m
+1 today,,if u can’t believe, ,is it
me that will now believe? ??
28)Since I removed fat pple from
my Facebook and WhatsApp, my
MB dey last now even my battery
29) The way some people use to
quote Psalm 23 nowadays
ehn!!! – “As I walk through
the valley of death”
I dey
craze? Wetin carry me go
30) Small quarrel, you want to
break up.
In which relationship abeg; the
one I suffered to toast you?
31)After snapping with someone
else car, your village people will
think you made it in life, and they
just seize the small garri you are

32)When I was a kid, I wanted to
be a doctor. But then I realised
typing “Amen” on Facebook can
cure cancer*
33) Gone where the days when
ladies could cook like their
mothers but now they smoke like
descendants of Bob Marley
34) Imagine Dangote giving you
a cheque of 100 million using his
left hand……… A whole u
Be sincere will u collect it??

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