1.I was Shocked when I heard A fat girl
singing I believe I Can Fly ” My sister, have
you Ever seen an Elephant Flying Before?
2.Women will always tell you that men can cheat and tell lies, but they seem to forgeting that “What a man can do, a woman can do better”… Guys are you with me??
3.My friend forgot his apple laptop on the floor in my room. My grandma thought it was a scale.
CONCLUSION: My grandma now weighs 250,500naira
4.She told me she was coming to
my place by 9pm,But
she came by 7 pm & caught me
woman…How can I forgive her for
lying to me??
5.Last night I had a dream and I was kissing my neighbour’s daughter but this morning she saw me
and pretended like nothing happened
Girls can pretend ooh
6.Some people will come to the ATM,
see others on queue and still ask
“is it paying”?
No, we came to vote for Buhari Again.. Please shift joor!
7.I don’t no why people who Sits in front of
a commercial Bus always Feel as if they
Have made it in life
8.I will be naming my daughter ‘Pregnant” so when a guy meets her:
Guy: Hi, am lucky
Her: Hi, am Pregnant.
9.When you are not fasting you
can stay till afternoon without
But when you are fasting, even Tv
remote will be looking like gala in
your eyes… Is that not witchcraft??
10.My girlfriend just caught my side chick n I in bed , she went straight to the kitchen to boil hot water .. Think she’s getting us some tea
11De most patience customers in de world are those buying Condom. Dey will like, serve him first i will wait
12.i never knew the power of weed until I saw a 90years old man telling me he wants to be a lawyer when he grows….
13.Stop taking pictures beside people’s car, your village people will kill you for nothing.*
14.They said dangote started business with 200$ his uncle gave him, my own problem is my uncle… When I flash him he will flash back
15.Self sacrifice is when two witches from your
village are discussing who’s gonna be the
next victim…..then you pass by singing “I’m
the one” by DJ khaled…you are finished.
16.I bought power Bank N650 and I was very
happy it was cheap until my phone started
charging the power Bank.
17.Naija police be like: Oga why are you
walking on the road with singlet in this cold
You want cold to enter your body so you can
go and look for somebody’s daughter to rape
abi? You are under arrest for attempting rape
in advance my friend enter motor.
18.The time I knew this recession was getting
tough is when I heard a man pricing NEPA
..Bros How much for low current ??
19.When I get a Whatsapp Message asking me to forward it to
10 people or I die in 7 days. I close the message and wait for
death to come.
20.When you take a girl to ATM she will start apologizing for things
she hasn’t Done.
“Honey am sorry for shouting at you next week”
21.A friend of mine asked me if I’m willing to go to
London… See question!!
who wants to stay in this Nigeria where
1. Fowls rape themselves
2. Exam questions come out before the proposed
3. Bigger Banana are cheaper while smaller ones are
4. You buy Suya 100 Naira and when you get home,you
realise the Aboki sold Onions 70 Naira and meat 30
5. Garri is more expensive than Noodles.. Try drinking
the Garri for 20 Days straight,Falz Glasses will be small
size compared to your own
6. You get Pirated Yoruba movie and you get home to
see Bruce Lee(Enter the Dragon Part 1)
7. Ghosts in nollywood fear cars when crossing the road because
They don’t want to die again
If you advice me to stay in Nigeria ehn! Hmmmmmmmn
just dnt let me talk!!!!!
Drop Your Jokes or Comments Below